What We Neglect

For some reason on my walk this morning I began an Examen of my conscience for actions, thoughts, words I needed to confess and ask forgiveness for. (This isn’t a daily practice for me, lest you think I’m impressed with my own spiritual practices. I’m not.) Among the detritus of behaviors, comments, and attitudes I’m not proud of that bobbed to the surface like luggage from a shipwreck, the word “neglect” slowly floated into view. My conscience was telling me I was guilty of neglect. That surprised me so I pulled the thread to see where it led.

I’ve noted for awhile that I’m on my phone much more than I used to be, not just looking at personal messages, email, etc., but viewing everything social media has to offer. Part of this has to do with a legitimate desire to keep up with the dizzying news cycle, but while I’m seeking to get a handle on current events, the less noble distractions on Facebook and Instagram beckon (I’m not on TikTok, Threads or Twitter, and have determined I’ve ventured as far as I intend to on the social media frontier). I’m lured by seemingly everything — from the inspiring and uplifting to the comical and ridiculous. I’ve always known myself to have a tendency towards addiction, not that I’ve ventured into the dangerous areas usually associated with the word. I’ve been addicted to TV, sugar –Coca Cola and all its variants, overeating in general. That kind of thing. I’ve had a hard time making friends with Moderation in various arenas.

So when the word “neglect” presented itself I was puzzled. As is my habit, I immediately Googled the etymology of the word and, as usual, loved what I learned. The word is made up of two Latin roots — legare, meaning to pick up, collect or gather, and the negative concept of ne or nec — to not, essentially. In its original use it meant literally, physically — as in failing to pick up all of the fruit under a tree, and over time evolved into the abstract meaning we commonly use today. An irrelevant but fun fact I learned was how reading is connected to the root legare: because we gather letters and collect words together on a page to communicate meaning (that should be a picture book), the definition broadened to encompass the concept that something is legible.

So… knowing that the word neglect includes the idea of “not,” I connected my new habit of spending too much leisure time scrolling on my phone to what I have NOT spent time and attention on. And that is kind of the flip side of addiction, isn’t it? Once I allow myself to become addicted to something, it automatically means that I am neglecting something else. When I eat too much sugar, I’m neglecting my health. When I cannot turn off the TV, I am neglecting other leisure pursuits. When I refuse to put down my phone, I am neglecting people around me. Or a very sweet, patient dog. And when I am addicted to a variety of Leisure Pursuits, I am aware that I’m neglecting my own spiritual walk.

What do I want to gather and collect in the days I am blessed with? This is not necessarily a new question, but my perspective has shifted slightly to consider what I might neglect. This will continue to be an ongoing conversation with myself. But I don’t think I need to watch more clips of old TV shows, listen to more angry voices spouting venom about something or other, or follow another person renovating a crumbling chateau (although I find that kind of rejuvenation personally uplifting). As I continue my effort to establish a healthier relationship with my Android and its best friend, social media, I hope to become better acquainted with Balance, Moderation, and Intention. But I’ll probably always make time for We Rate Dogs .